Sharing these lines from her book, it might be of help as it has in anyway has lifted my spirit:
Some Sanity Survival Hints according to Sue, which I find it very helpful
You always have a choice when it comes to what you tell yourself (and others)
To change the way you talk to yourself (others), say positive, affirming statements daily.
Negative words keep the body in a state of tension, constricting muscles and blood vessels, creating an atmosphere of disharmony and frayed nerves. Positive words create an atmosphere of peace. They calm our nerves.
Alter your stressful vocabulary by moving beyond your habitual favorites, Instead of saying, ‘I feel awful’, try identifying your experience specifically by stating ‘I’m overwhelmed … insecure .. Frightened... embarrassed.”
Eliminate the word ‘hate’ from your vocabulary. This word allows your mind, body, and soul to be filled with disgust, loathing and repulsion – not good seeds to plant.
Research has shown that when we speak positive words, even in difficult circumstances, we become more relaxed. As we loosen up, the flow of blood to the brain increases, and we can think more creatively, make wise decisions, find innovative solutions and generate insightful answers.
I’m struggling though to imbibe all those things, as for the longest time a little packet of my life has been holding such a depressing chaplet, I’ve been trying, OK.
I affirm today, I don’t hate my MIL anymore, waaaaaaaaaahhh, the hardest words ever.